One of the most common critiques I hear as a homeschooling mom is the dreaded question: “But what about socialization?”
It always makes me smile. Because the truth is, I think over-socialization is a much greater concern than under-socialization.
Think about it: a child who spends all day in school surrounded by peers, and then is immediately sent back out with more peers until bedtime, is missing something essential—time with their parents. Time to be guided, taught, and anchored in values that will serve them for life.
Here’s the hard truth: kids don’t learn how to become thoughtful, kind, and empathetic adults by spending the majority of their hours with other kids. They learn those things from you—their parents. Children imitate whatever environment they’re most immersed in. If they spend their days surrounded by peers who are still learning self-control, respect, or kindness, guess what? They’ll pick up those habits, too.
I’ve seen this play out in so many ways:
A child who suddenly starts rolling their eyes or talking back after spending time with friends who do the same. Kids who develop unhealthy obsessions with material things because that’s what their peers are focused on. Children who mimic poor eating habits, reckless behavior, or unkind speech, all picked up from the “crowd” they run with.
Now, does this mean kids shouldn’t have friends? Absolutely not! Friendships are important and can be a beautiful part of childhood. But they are meant to supplement a child’s upbringing, not replace it.
It is our responsibility as parents to set the tone. To be the ones shaping their character, guiding their choices, and helping them process the world around them. Children need adults—loving, consistent, intentional adults—to help them grow into the people God has called them to be.
So the next time someone worries that your child isn’t “socialized enough,” remind them that what truly matters isn’t how many hours they log with other kids, but how much time they spend with parents who are pouring truth, wisdom, and love into their hearts.
Our kids don’t need other kids to raise them. They need us.
Raising Light 